FC Dallas 5, LA Galaxy 6

So, the media was practically hyperventilating and the marketing morons for FC Dallas were having sustained climaxes at the realization that David Beckham, the megastar of all things football in Britain (and really around the world), was leaving his team (Real Madrid where, for a while he was considered a 'has been' but also where eventually he redeemed his reputation by playing some amazing soccer and leading that team to supreme victory) to come to the states and play Major League Soccer for Los Angeles. And also, LA threw stacks and stacks of cash at him..

There were obviously major advantages surrounding this buy out for American soccer since we are typically seen as the "joke league" around the world. We don't play as fast as the Europeans, we don't handle the ball as beautifully as the Latin Americans, and we play with more integrity (as in not as many dives or headbutts) than several countries which, unfortunately, means we lose. Our league IS a baby league and we are slowly bringing up the level of play so as to be as competitive as the rest of the world.

So, bringing Becks to the states was supposed to boost American interest in soccer. His (gorgeous) body on the field was supposed to put butts in seats and was supposed to be one of the first steps in bringing several football megastars to the US in order to raise the level of competition. As it stands now we only export our major players, especially since most of our players have to work two jobs to sustain any kind of living here and they can make the same income by asking you if you "want fries with that."

The point of me telling you all of this is that MLS was getting their big break. Or at least the world would be watching to see what would happen to Becks and Posh. (Could they stand living in such uncivilized filth?) But also maybe they would see that MLS is not a big lazy side show missing its main clown.

Only it was on Tuesday night.

The game was SOLD OUT which was a HUGE deal since the stadium is usually only 1/4 full. I even have to admit that when I bought my ticket package, I requested the "Beckham game." Two nights before the game, I was..um. - I mean- people were painting their "Becks, I want to have your baby!" signs for the game, and the marketers for FC were busy patting themselves on the backs (handshakes and toasts all around) when the news came that LA decided to leave David Beckham at home.

WHAT?

We knew Becks was injured, and that we weren't going to see him "bend" anything. But he was at least going to be on the sidelines, right? Nope. Life. as. we. know. it. ended!!!

OK, OK. It wasn't THAT dramatic, but we were disappointed. And those of us who actually support MLS who went to the game anyway knew that this was a major hit to Dallas soccer. The team was really going to have to put on a show at this game for all of the folks who had paid to see Beckham and who were going to have to settle for (choke) Landon Donovan.

In short, the first half was a disaster! We were down by 3 within the first twenty minutes. We got it together in the second half and FC (after a beautiful bicycle kick goal that was called back) brought back their game and lost by one point in this, the most bizarrely fantastic soccer show in the history of MLS. And we didn't need no stinking David Beckham!

Click here for a more intelligent, comprehensive game report by Jamie F.


END NOTES:
1. I LOVE Juan Toja (#8) and his supersonic mullet.

2. Landon Donovan is an ungracious, nancy pants a-hole! And I will NEVER support him again, not even on the national team.


Guy sitting next to me: Did you see why Landon Donovan got that yellow card?
Me: Was it because he has an extremely large forehead?
Guy: (looking confused) No. It's because he shushed the crowd, pointed at us, and then pretended to slash his throat (while mouthing "game over") after he scored his last goal.
Me: I know. I saw it. (yelling) Suck my d____, Landon Donovan!
(sorry Mom. I did, in fact, risk my own yellow card at the game to yell this and it was in poor form. But I still mean it.)

3. Favorite fan signs at our Beckham-less game:
a. "Bench it like Beckham! "
b. "English exports:
2 million Harry Potter books - priceless.
250 million dollar football player - worthless.
Where the Beck are you? "


Pictures borrowed from 3rd Degree website, Reuters, AP, and my own camera.